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How To Ensure Everyone in the Family is a Part of its Growth

“Family life is not a computer program that runs on its own; it needs continual input from everyone.”

 

How To Ensure Everyone in the Family is a Part of its Growth
“Family life is not a computer program that runs on its own; it needs continual input from everyone.” ― Neil Kurshan

 

Family is a huge word in our country as well as in other nations. Everything revolves around this. Imagine a family being the sun and how it regulates the earth (in our case, the entire society and economy). Undoubtedly, it is its members that keep it going.

In a way, it feels surreal to write about this topic. I will tell you why in the latter part of this article.

Where families flourish everything around it thrives too. As we understand the importance of a family, let us dive in deep to see how important it is for everyone to be a part of its growth.

4 Pillars that Keep a Family Going

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    • Love

This goes without saying. Where a family is filled with love, it sustains well.

“What can you do to promote world peace? Go home and love your family.”
Mother Teresa

The power of love can never be underestimated. My mother in law once told me that when husband and wife come together in love with determination and hard work, there is nothing that can stop them from achieving their goals.

Family is built on love but sometimes it could be hard to genuinely love another in the family and that takes us to the next most important thing.

    • Hope and Trust

As simple it might sound, to hope is the best thing we could do at times of adversity in the family coupled with trust. When there is mutual trust and hope, it gives a family to push through.

“We need people in our lives with whom we can be as open as possible. To have real conversations with people may seem like such a simple, obvious suggestion, but it involves courage and risk.”
― Thomas Moore

    • Communication

The most basic but the most crucial of everything that keeps a family going is communication. Most of the issues that people face in a family can be easily solved when communicated better.

With this to remember, let’s understand why in a family everyone should be a part of it and how to ensure everyone in the family is a part of its growth.

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Family Members are the Wheels that Run It

For the smooth functioning of the family system, every member is responsible and should be a part of its growth, be it the smaller kids or the elderly ones.

I say this because most of the time, in our patriarchal society, the entire pressure falls on the man of the house and the wife is blamed for anything that goes wrong. But it should not be this way as this leads to unwanted complications, stress, and even failure in each one’s roles.

When everyone in the family is aware of their responsibilities, a peaceful ecosystem can be established which helps to run the family smoothly.

To me personally, it took a lot of time to understand this when I was newly married. It felt chaotic as I thought a family runs on its own. I was naive enough to believe that it is designed in a way it goes on in default mode.

So I did not prioritize it much. I focused on my career and did the things I wanted to do. A gap always existed and every time I looked at it felt like I had to do something.

When I finally understood that relationships do not nourish in their way and by pre-set schedules that’s when I began to make little changes.

I prioritized my family, changed the way I looked at work and family life. This began to change the whole picture. I was finally understanding my family.

It is with this confidence I wanted to share with you all, how everyone in the family should ensure its growth.

10 Ways To Ensure Everyone in the Family is a Part of its Growth

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1. Accept Each Other

Where there is acceptance, there is room for growth. People are so different from each other. This might scare you especially when you step into a new family or bring in new people but to see them as what they are and accepting them gives ample space to grow.

Remember, acceptance is the key to opening your hearts towards the light.

2. Believe in One Another

Have you seen little children hesitating to try new things in front of you? It is because they think that you might be thinking that they can’t do it. But when you give them that trust and tell them that – ‘I know, you can do it’, they will be happy to try it even if they fail in it.

When people in a family believe in the potential and goodness of other members, it brings a whole level of new energy in the bonds and leads the family to grow.

3. Family Rituals and Traditions

This is extremely important. Though in this fast-paced world everyone moves at lightning speed, stopping and slowing down to enjoy and celebrate the family rituals is a great way to ensure everyone is a part of its growth.

These rituals help family members to know each other better, bringing in a sense of oneness and bonding.

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4. Do Not Neglect Anyone

In most joint families, the majority of work or importance falls under one person so the other feels neglected.

This can happen between siblings or older people. We tend to think that they can’t do much but they can. Everyone in the family can influence the climate within.

5. A Role for everyone to Ensure the Growth of the Family

When I joined a job for the first time, I had very little to do. It felt so empty. I did not feel like working most of the time and did not feel like I was wanted.

The same thing happens in the family when we give a role to everyone which should not be a burden, it helps people to feel like they are being wanted. This feeling helps one to do their best.

6. Let the Creative Side Work

It might sound a little irrelevant but one thing we can all remember is, our brains are wired in a way they crave new things, they want to explore new things.

So in the family too instead of holding on to the same old set of schedules and routines, bring up creative things that excite everyone. This way everyone can understand and know each other better.

7. Prioritize Each Other to Ensure Growth in the Family

The day I started to prioritize my family members over my schedules, I began to breathe more, live in the moment and felt happy.

But I must also say, it should be balanced. Bonding should never happen at the cost of sacrificing yourself.

Family is a bond knit with love. Family is very raw and also vulnerable but it is what fuels it. So when members are prioritized by each other, the family grows automatically.

8. Have Common Goals in the Family

Individual goals are great but what about family goals? Having a common goal in the family will motivate each other to work and stay in the same wave light.

Family goals can be anything like saving and going on a vacation, eating together at least one meal a day, having a happy mess-free home etc.

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9. Family Discussions are a great way to ensure everyone is a part of the Family

Family discussions help the members to come together. But remember, it should be a place where there are no judgements and no poking at each other.

Instead, it should be a safe space to share, communicate, voice out or vent anything one feels like. It should be open to complaints and learning.

These discussions thus can help family members to be open and talk through anything with peace. It gives confidence, builds trust and strengthens bonds.

10. Uninterrupted Fun Family Times

One of the toughest goals to achieve in real-time but it is possible.

Have you seen or been to employee engagement and team-building parties where you go out as a team, eat, play and just have fun.

It’s a great stress buster but beyond that, it glues the people together and improves relationships and creativity so when you are back to work, you naturally feel more pumped and excited to work with your team towards the organization’s goals.

The same thing happens in families too. The more bonded and relaxed you are, the better it is for the family to keep going.

I think all of these can be beautifully summarized by this quote here.

“In truth, a family is what you make it. It is made strong, not by the number of heads counted at the dinner table, but by the rituals you help family members create, by the memories you share, by the commitment of time, caring, and love you show to one another, and by the hopes for the future you have as individuals and as a unit.”
Marge Kennedy

Having said all this, ensuring everyone is part of the family’s growth also means the family in itself has a safe space where its members are kind and loving to each other, it is not abusive and non-judgemental.

Hope my life lessons inspired you to have a happy growing family. Do you have any family rituals that help to bond or any goals that your family is working on?

We would love to hear your thoughts on this.

Cheers!

 

*****

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Josephine Mary
Josephine Mary
Josephine is an enthusiastic soul from the Nilgiris. Her childhood was painted with the beautiful writings of eminent authors. With a masters in social development, she finds inspiration from people beyond cultures. BeAnInspirer is a place where she shares her reflections to inspire and spread positivity alongside helping to understand life and herself more.

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